Having a dog can be great for a number of reasons, not least of which is it gives you ample opportunity to use the many dog puns and jokes that dog breeds have spawned. Yes, having a dog can be frustrating, especially when our dogs do not always live up to our expectations. But that’s when you resort to a good dog pun to liven the mood. True, your dog has no idea what you’re saying; but they at least should get the hint that you’re not mad anymore!
Here we take a look at the 101 Best Dog Puns that creative minds the world over have come up with using nothing more than their daily dog experiences, observations of the characteristics (and often funny-sounding names) of dogs, and their brilliant imaginations. This means that no matter what kind of dog breed you call your own, one of our dog puns should certainly fill the void that a frustrating experience with your dog creates. These dog puns and jokes are good to tell a friend, a significant other, or even yourself when your hairy friend pushes you to your limit.
Dogs & Puns: Why They're Perfect for Each Other
There is something about a pun that just seems to work well with dogs. Maybe it’s because some dog breeds have interesting names, which is thanks to the diverse origins of the hundreds of dog breeds that exist today. Some dogs are just funny looking. One reason why dog jokes and puns are so much fun is perhaps because there’s something about the personality of a dog that makes joking about them so easy that it almost seems natural.
Just like other types of jokes, dog jokes can take many different forms. Though some may consider puns to be the lowest form of humor, we prefer to reserve that honor for the good old physical comedy sketches. And besides, dogs are low to the ground so puns about dogs suit them just fine. We promise the jokes get better from here on out, folks.
We start out our list of dog puns with simple words and phrases derived from dog names and other hilarious aspects of dogs. From there, we weave our way into the world of punny dog jokes, making use of some of the best dog puns out there. Yes, there are only 101 dog puns in this list, but there is no need to be melan-Collie. You are free to come up with your own list of dog puns. We hope this list takes you back to the happier time of childhood, when you read books like Beowoof and Harry Pawter or watched films like Raiders of the Lost Bark and Indiana Bones.
The Best Dog Puns
What makes a good pun? Well, that is debatable, but we would say that good dog puns are ones that fit seamlessly into the lexicon of the English language while clearly drawing your mind back to the image of a dog. Good dog puns can easily sneak their way into a sentence about just about anything. Just when you think you’re talking about the weather, all of the sudden the image of a dog crops up and carries you off in another direction. Are you ready for some good dog puns? You are? Well, put down that corgi and come dachshund through the snow with us. We are starting off with punny dog names.
Punny Dog Names
Some dog puns naturally incline themselves to more than just a word or two. We will get to some punny dog jokes later, but dog puns in the form of one-liners are great too. They sort of straddle the fence between a full-blown dog joke and a simple dog pun. They serve well as standalone jokes, and they can almost get you the same amount of chuckle that you would expect from a wholeheartedly undertaken dog joke. Here are a few good punny one-liners.
The Best Punny Dog Jokes
As far as dog puns go, one-liners and punny dog names are pretty great, but nothing quite takes the place of a full-fledged dog joke. This is your opportunity to set the scene, lead the listener on, you know, tease them a bit, and just when they think they know what’s going on you hit ‘em with a dog joke. As funny as Anderson Pooper may be, dog puns in the form of full-out jokes allow you to get a bit more of a laugh.
Oh, no, no, no, Mildred, you’re not getting fat. You’re just a little Husky.
It’s a good idea to put a fence around your grill when you’re out there grilling your ribs. You wouldn’t want your dogs to get the bark-B-Q.
I like the idea of doggie hotels, but I visited one once and it was just too paw-sh for my taste.
I went to the zoo because I wanted to see lots of different types of animals. You know, I have always loved the zoo ever since I was a little kid. Well, to my surprise, I walked all around the place and all I saw was one tiny, little dog. It was a Shih-tzu.
It’s always a good idea to keep your puppy indoors on frigid winter nights. You wouldn’t want any pupsicles to form.
Hey, Rufus, did you see where I left my car before we went to the pet store? I did not leave it in the barking lot, did I?
The Chinese crested dog was furious that it could not catch the rabbit scurrying on the lawn. But I told the dog that it was all right. We all have our bad hare days.
Ooh, child, the puggle is real!
Oh, sorry, I am not quite ready to go yet. Wouldn’t want to forget my doggie bag.
The friendly Labrador that always sits around and watches our baseball practice probably knows the ropes better than I do by now. He knows enough to be the rufferee.
I would feed my Cavalier King Charles terriers chocolates, but they are so well-bred, you know. I wouldn’t want them to go mutts.
Dogs are truly a woman’s best friend. They are very loyal, you see. Totally devoted to their dog-ma.
Whenever my Chihuahua meets my friends Doberman pincher, he never stands his ground. He just rolls over.
Is it true that the Queen of England loves Corgis? I heard that they serve as her Paw-dy Guards.
If your dog refuses to eat the gourmet dog food you bought for him you can find yourself in a dog-matic situation.
Sheesh, I’ll get it done. Quit hounding me!
One day, the curious Golden Retriever was sniffing around a large elm tree. That was when the friendly sheepdog approached the Golden Retriever and said, “You won’t find any food there, my friend. You are barking up the wrong tree.”
I’m just about paws-itive that the stray dog at the pound had some bulldog in him.
If you get too many dogs, you just might end up with a rover-dose.
It’s not hard to understand why dogs never remember the training from obedience school. A dog ate their homework.
Excuse me, but that is my Chihuahua sitting on your couch. I did not allow you to take paw-session of it.
Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poop-on?
I was confused because I couldn’t find the doggy chew toe, but then I found Rufus and he already had paw-session of it.
My dog likes to watch while my wife is baking. I know it seems safe, but you never know. I wouldn’t want her to end up in the Collie flour.
Are you familiar with the Chinese Zodiac? It’s supposed to be the Year of the Dog this year. I really hope it doesn’t turn out to be a ruff one.
Oh, you want to go to the Grand Canyon this year? I went last year with my dog and we had a great time. I accidentally dropped a bone in the canyon and little Bess retrieved it for me. I know it sounds far-fetched, but it’s true.
My dog is beautiful but she can be a handful sometimes, let me tell you. She can bark all night without a paws in between.
There’s a fabulous dog that is known for being among the smartest of dog breeds. You know, they are just the tops! I believe they live somewhere near the Border of Collie-fornia.
Oh, you buried your wife with the family dog? Is that because her body will Rottweiler spirit will live on?
My wife was a little confused about the new dog tag we got because she had never seen anything like it before. I told her that it was nothing special. It was just collar ID.
It’s a good idea not to let your dachshund fall asleep outside when the sun’s up. You know, they don’t like being hot dogs.
It’s all right. Things will get better as they always do. No need to be melan-Collie.
Did you hear that Queen Elizabeth II of England is visiting the United States this year? Yeah, it’s true. She’s visiting her favorite state in the Union: South Corgilina. You know, South Corgilina. It’s right next to North Corgilina, just to the south of it.
It’s always a good idea to be exceedingly cautious after it runs. Not just the typical precautions, you know, you do need to take great care and watch where you’re going. You wouldn’t want to step in a poodle.
I wish I could take my German Shepherd with me on my construction jobs, but the foreman won’t let me. You know, this dog has always been an excellent roofer.
What’s the first thing your dog does when you purchase him from a blacksmith? As soon as he gets home he’ll make a bolt for the door.
I took my Dalmatian to the dog show. No, I just have the one. You’re thinking of the movie. Anyway, you want to know what my Dalmatian did as the show attendants began to approach him. He jumped right into stands because he did not want to be spotted.
Where does a dog have to go when it loses its tail? The re-tail store.
What is the single greatest city in the world for a dog? New Yorkie.
A dachshund is watching his very YouTube video of a dog watching TV on your laptop. How does he stop the video? He hits the paws button.
Do you know what happens when you try to cross a dog with a hare? It’s very simple really. You end up with a rabid dog.
I have always been a fan of books, but my dogs prefer to watch the adaptations when they chance to appear on the television. They are always glued to the TV set whenever Harry Pawter comes on.
My dog is so smart that I just do not know what to do with him. He even wants to eat like me. For instance, for breakfast, he refuses to eat anything but woofles.
I always go to see any Star Wars movies when they come out because I have been a fan, ever since I was a little kid. I loved the newest one, but it fell just short of the mark for me. My favorite character was always Chew-barka.
I got home early from one work one day and was able to find a really good marathon of episodes of an old television series playing. You’ve probably heard of it: Sherlock Bones. No?
The English language really has declined since the time of Shakespeare, if I do say so myself. Yes, the modern era has given us Absalom! Absalom! and Brideshead Revisited, but can anything ever compare to the words of Droolius Caesar?
My sister got really upset that her dog accidentally spilled water all over her laptop and now she has to get it replaced. I said, “Don’t forget that you have insurance. Don’t terrier yourself up about it!”
They were saying on the TV that Britain was considering granting independence to one of its few remaining colonies in the West Indies. Apparently, it is an island where all of the citizens are corgis. They’re going to hold a re-fur-endum.
Everyone always thinks that my dog is a mutt, but he is actually a member of a very rare breed that has pretty much disappeared from many parts of the world. I managed to get him from a breeder who specializes in this type. His breeding is highly secretive, and he does not post on the internet. I got my little guy from him. I call him Last of the Pawhicans.
My girlfriend always wanted to go to the Met gala but we never could get a ticket. Besides, I do not think either of us could afford the sort of outfits that we would need to wear to get in the door anyhow. Anyway, we decided to get all our dogs together and throw our own little Mutt gala on the lawn. You should have seen the sequins gown that my wife wore. I told her she was looking quite fetching.
You know, it may seem like a good idea to take your dog to the pet store, that way you can make sure you’re getting just the right thing, but you have to be careful. You wouldn’t want the dog to go mutts over all the sales in the pet store.
It may not be the Year of the Dog, but these dog puns should help you get through a rainy, cold, or stormy rest of the year. Actually, we have no idea if it is the Year of the Dog or not, it very well may be, especially if you live near the border of Collie-fornia or you happen to be watching television coverage of Queen Elizabark II during her visit to her favorite state in the union, South Corgilina. Need more dog puns? Don't worry. I'll collie you later.